(Painting ‘Incomplete Dance’ by Medha Pandey)
Why should I see you?
When in my eyes, you didn’t find yourself.
I was your mirror,
still, in me, you seemed like someone else.
I walk in darkness now,
for your light left me blind.
Thorns do kiss my feet,
but the pain never finds it.
Why should I wish for the Sun?
When it was night, that stood by me.
I called for the birds,
but it was silence, that spoke to me.
I longed for the hurried wind,
but sweat didn’t leave my skin.
Free sky rested above my head,
but fear housed me from within.
Why should I run out of the door?
When the keys, I locked them in the safe.
The dress kept hanging,
and shoes put clean, on the shelf.
The dance I was promised,
though life didn’t ask for my hand.
The song, I still remember,
but my words failed to reach your end.
Why should I look up to pray?
When I feel lost in the herd.
My tears, I wished for them,
but my eyes kept itching with dirt.
My mind, full of dreams,
waiting for a perpetual flight.
My desires noosed around my neck;
neither loose nor too tight.
Why did you keep me out of sight?
from my sun, my wind, from the songs of the lark.
Though shadows, they found me lying,
from my waist, they lifted me, in the dark.
My wings, once rusted,
now gained a new air, to start.
Still no music for my ears,
but a shallow rhythm of my heart.
Why do you hope to find me?
I am now free from your dismal light.
The doors are not on me now,
the promises, they broke all the ties.
My desires are now around my waist,
my shoes rattling the floor with a spark.
But, if you could see past the shadows,
I will still be alone, dancing in the dark.